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Posted Sun, Jun 5, 2005

Matt Winer's Boston Globe obituary

By Jane E. Allen

Here is the obituary for Matt Winer that appeared in the June 3rd edition of the Boston Globe. Note that his daughter Molly is 10, not 9, as stated; and that he actually is survived by two brothers, Josh and Jonathan.

Matthew Winer; specialized in psychiatric therapies

By Nicole Haley, Globe Correspondent

June 3, 2005

Matthew Stephen Terr Winer was a psychiatrist and private man who loved adventure and cared deeply about other people, colleagues say. He spent several months of his medical residency at clinics in Nigeria and Alaska. When he left Africa, he took only the clothes on his back and his passport.

''He looked around and saw how little they had. He decided to leave all of his clothes, books, and money for the clinic," said his longtime friend Michael Denmeade, a recreational therapist in New Hampshire.

Dr. Winer, a psychiatrist in New Hampshire and Vermont who specialized in alternative psychiatric therapies, died of lung cancer May 21 at Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston. He was 47.

A Boston native, Dr. Winer graduated from Wayland High School in 1976, Yale University in 1980, and Boston University School of Medicine in 1985. After training in alternative psychiatric therapies, Dr. Winer took his residency at the Dartmouth-Mary Hitchcock Medical Center in Lebanon, N.H.

Denmeade, who met Dr. Winer at Dartmouth in 1989, described his friend as a man who could relate to anyone regardless of age, beliefs, or culture. Though he worked in adult psychiatry, Dr. Winer had a way with children and loved to spend time with his 9-year-old daughter, Molly Elizabeth Joy. Even after he got sick, Dr. Winer coached his daughter's softball team while in remission, Denmeade said.

''Whenever he would tell stories, he was so animated that children were in awe," Denmeade said. ''He had an infectious smile and very caring eyes."

Dr. Winer, who lived in Hanover, N.H., worked in healthcare clinics in the Upper Valley area of New Hampshire and Vermont.

John England worked with Dr. Winer for seven years while Dr. Winer was the clinical director of the Counseling Center of Lebanon, in Lebanon, N.H. England described his former colleague as an intelligent and philosophical man with ''almost a religious fervor" for nature. ''I think that if he had any fault at all, it was that he cared too much about the clients he worked for," England said.

In his free time, Dr. Winer enjoyed playing the works of Bach, Beethoven, and Debussy on his baby grand piano. His brother Joshua of Waltham said that music and nature were essential parts of Dr. Winer's life. ''He played piano mostly for himself, and he knew every little tree on his 3 acres of property," his brother said.

Dr. Winer was a deeply spiritual man who loved to travel and experience other cultures. His background was Jewish but he embraced Buddhist principles as an adult. After he married Margaret Sheehan, the couple took a year off from work to circle the globe. He hiked Mount Everest and met the Dalai Lama.

Denmeade said that Dr. Winer never cared about worldly possessions. Though Dr. Winer was generous in giving to others, Denmeade said, when it came to buying something for himself, he was frugal. ''If he wanted something, he'd find it at a yard sale," Denmeade said.

Dr. Winer spoke French fluently and enjoyed skiing in the French Alps. In recent years, he enjoyed taking retreats with a men's group based in Hanover, N.H. Denmeade, also a member of the group, said the men rented cabins twice a year to spend the weekend together exploring nature and talking about what it means to be a husband and father.

England said that in his final years, Dr. Winer spent a lot of time philosophizing on the meaning of mortality. His biggest fear in dying, England said, was the thought of leaving behind his daughter.

''He always thought about how one chooses to live one's life and what's really important," his brother said. ''At the end, when he got cancer, I think that helped him."

In addition to his wife, daughter, and brother, Dr. Winer leaves his parents, Bertram and Mimi of Wayland; and a brother, Jonathan of Bethesda, Md.

Services have been held.